If you feel you are not being heard, push until you are satisfied and successful. Don’t wait until a devastating diagnosis of cancer to live life fully
For a year, my health was progressively getting worse. My health declined so much. I had lost 30 lbs in two months. My symptoms also included fever, night sweats, hair loss, anemia, gastrointestinal upset, and cough.
One day on my drive to work, anxiety I was experiencing and shortness of breath, sent me to the ER. I finally received a doctor who wanted to do a CT of my chest because of my pulmonary symptoms. He sent me to a pulmonologist. There were multiple lymph nodes surrounding my trachea that were huge. He told me it could be sarcoidosis or Lymphoma, which is a type of blood cancer that affects your lymph nodes.
On October 5, 2018, I was intubated. They went through my trachea to biopsy the enlarged lymph nodes surrounding my trachea. When I woke up from anesthesia, the pulmonologist gave me a preliminary diagnosis of lymphoma. Although I received the worst news of my life, I chose to stay strong and as positive as I possibly could. I met with my oncologist a few days later. After my first PET, I was told my official diagnoses was a Hodgkins Lymphoma 2B. I was able to freeze a few eggs and started chemotherapy on October 31, 2018.
I found that my cancer journey was a lot more emotionally and mentally challenging than physically. Not to say that I never experienced pain or discomfort. Most people have the support of their family and friends throughout the entirety of their treatment, I did not. This made things a lot harder than they had to be. My family was there in the beginning but soon showed their negative and selfish ways. I remember saying that I didn’t want negativity around me or at my chemotherapy treatments. That was turned into, I had banned them from my treatments. With that, I was ignored, excluded, and an enemy. I wasn’t the victim, but they were. I just can’t describe going through the absolute hell of cancer and not having unconditional support from your family. It was so lonely and devastating. There were times I would cry from the pits of my soul. My father was the only one that I felt sincere love from. He always rooted for me and checked up on me. Whenever I needed something he got it, and if a girl needed prayers, he had it covered.
I’ve learned a lot about people, and that you really can’t expect others to treat you the way you would treat them, regardless if they are family or not. On a positive note, my boyfriend was my main caregiver. He comforted me through my breakdowns and always reminded me of how beautiful I was, even when I looked my worst. Not only did he tell me I was beautiful, but he always reminded me that I am so strong. I have connected with strangers who are going through the same thing as I am. And I have found major support and comfort in them. My final message is that when your body is telling you something, be your own advocate. If you feel you are not being heard, push until you are satisfied and successful. Don’t wait until a devastating diagnosis of cancer to live life fully and abundantly. Take care of your body. Be good to those who are good to you. When people show you who they are, listen.
With that said, I had my “final” PET scan. As of April 15, 2019, I am in remission!
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